Deidara's Ultimate Tempation
by lxoxjoanxoxl
Summary: Tobi always knows just how to push Deidara's buttons and drive him over the edge. But at the same time, Tobi knows how to excite his partner and drive him crazy. From parfaits to bathtubs, today was just another usual day for the two lovers. Oneshot


Deidara's Ultimate Temptation

**As I decided to get off my ass and start updating some fics, I took a look over my old ones and decided that I could have done a lot better. Therefore, I have taken it upon myself to rewrite them so that I can't be counted as one of the bad fan-fiction authors. **

**My inner-self winces to use the word 'sempai' but seeing as there's no natural-sounding English substitute for me to use, I'll stick to it.**

**Some basic details to the setting: Deidara and Tobi are lovers in this and obviously, this takes place before Deidara's fight with Sasuke. Unfortunately, because of my terrible memory and the fact that I didn't really pay attention to the fight, I can't name a specific point. But hey, you guys are just here to fap to the lemon, am I right?**

***shot***

The First and Only Chapter

It was a nice day, the birds were chirping and the sun was shining. Nearly everyone was outside, enjoying it. That is, except for the hermits of society (also known as the Akatsuki). Each of them was inside the lair, doing whatever it is that S-ranked ninjas did for fun (besides killing other ninjas).

Deidara was busying molding a clay cockatoo with his explosive Playdough clay (fun to play with, not to eat indeed). He was busy sculpting the clay bird's crown when he heard a loud noise ("SEMPAI!"). Deidara let out a sharp gasp as his finger slipped and the clay exploded in his face. He thought, 'Not only is my bird ruined, but I have second-degree burns on my face, un . . .' He whipped around, ready to kill his source of annoyance but lost the ability to think clearly once he actually took a look at his ADD lover.

Tobi stood there with a goofy smile as usual. Wait; scratch that, seeing Tobi's **face** was anything but usual. His orange mask was pushed to the side, revealing a young face. His green eye sparkled, the other covered by a black eye-patch.

Deidara thought it was strange that Tobi's eye was green, as he was certain that he had seen a red eye behind Tobi's orange mask. Perhaps it was just him imagination?

There was also a bazooka gun strapped to his back, another thing that was out of place with not only this picture but time period. But, the thing that stuck out the most was…

"Why do you have dog ears and a tail?"

Deidara swore to God, Tobi's eyes literally sparkled as he answered the question, "Sempai seemed to be grumpy lately, so I asked Itachi-sempai if I could do anything to make you happier. He said something about bending over but Kisame-sempai stopped him before he could finish. Instead, Kisame suggested I should be obedient like a dog. So, I'm going to be like a dog today!"

Deidara forced the dirty images of Tobi chained up out of his head. He said, "I-I see, un . . ."

Tobi exclaimed, "Ah, Tobi almost forgot!" He dug around his pocket and pulled out a rhinestone collar, "The finishing touch! Sempai, can you help me with this thing? I can't get it on right!"

Deidara stared at the collar, unable to stop perverted fantasies from flooding his head. But he had to stay calm in front of Tobi (though nothing he did could probably ruin Tobi's shining image of him). He took the collar with trembling hands and fixed it around Tobi's neck.

Tobi smiled, "Thanks, Sempai!" He said, "Alright, let's go!"

He started dragging Deidara along before Deidara yelled, "Going where, un?"

Tobi replied, "The leader said to set out for the Village Hidden Among the Flowers in the Land of Earth. There's a bloodline there and the leader wants us to bring back one of them."

Deidara grumbled, "Fine, un."

…

Later in the Village Hidden Among the Flowers, three young ninjas were gathering morning glories. One had unique markings along his face, the so-called Heir to the Far-Reaching Eye. His name was Asoka, and he had high hopes for his future. But it was all about to end that day.

A large shadow cast over the trio as they looked up in shock. Deidara, who (along with Tobi) was riding on his bird proudly, said, "Hey, you there with the strange eyes. Do you possess the Far-Reaching Eye bloodline?"

The kunoichi to his right got into a defensive stance and yelled, "Run, Asoka!"

Asoka and the other kunoichi exclaimed, "But Izshu—!"

She screamed, "Run!"

Deidara smirked, "I don't think so." Grabbing a handful of pre-made birds, he scattered them in a circular manner and created a moat-like structure. He then turned to Tobi, "Go get the kid now!"

Tobi nodded, "Yes, sempai!" He jumped down and stood in front of Asoka, who was paralyzed with fear. He held the bazooka at eye-level. He smiled as he pressed a button.

The two girls started screaming, but then stopped once they realized nothing happened.

". . . Huh?" Asoka blinked. Popping out of Tobi's bazooka was a white flag that said, 'I surrender.'

". . . Looks like I made a mistake, a-ha-ha-ha!"

In a fit of rage, Deidara jumped down from his clay bird and landed on Tobi's head, driving Tobi into the ground, "Idiot!"

The younger ninjas were caught off guard by this silly display. Then, Izshu exclaimed, "Asoka, Natsuhime, run!"

Deidara shifted his attention from Tobi to the three at hand, "Oh no you don't!" He pulled out three clay spiders (two were bombs, one was filled with stunning gas). He tossed the two bombs at the female ninjas, who were far enough from Asoka for him to not get caught in the blast. He tossed the remaining spider at Asoka. Once the dirt that was kicked up settled, Asoka was lying on his back, unconscious. The other two were covered in burns.

Deidara strode over to Asoka and hefted him over his shoulder, "That is how a mission is carried out." He then jumped onto his clay bird and motioned for Tobi to follow.

Tobi said with admiration, "Wow, sempai, you work really fast! I wanna be strong like you!" He jumped upon the bird and grinned at Deidara.

Deidara, basking in Tobi's compliments, said, "Hmph, try harder and you'll get it."

The peaceful equilibrium didn't last for on their ride back. Sure enough, Tobi made a stupid comment about Deidara's girly looks, which lead him to getting kicked off the bird.

…

Back at the base, Deidara had dropped off their prisoner and gotten two strawberry parfaits as an apology to Tobi. Luckily, the way to a man's heart was through his stomach, as Tobi completely forgot about his freefall from 50 yards up in the air courtesy of his sempai (though he probably would have forgotten it later anyways).

Tobi said, parfait splashed all over his face, "Mmm, this is really tasty, sempai!" His false dog tail was somehow wagging (probably through a ninja technique, or more likely a logic-hole).

As some parfait landed on Deidara's face, he said with disgust, "Be less sloppy when you eat. And don't talk while you're eating either, I don't want your second-hand parfait."

Tobi smiled cheerily, "Ok!" Of course, it was just lip-service as Tobi continued eating in a messy manner. Soon, the parfait was all gone (though it was not as if it ever stood a chance). Upset, Tobi looked forlornly at his empty cup. His eyes began to wander over to Deidara's, which was half-way gone. His eyes glinted. Good enough.

"Oh, my brilliant and most definitely male sempai—"

"Not going to happen, so fuck off, un."

Tobi pleaded, putting on his best puppy eyes, "Pwease, sempai?"

Deidara choked on his spoon at the sight. He blushed heavily and growled, "No means no."

The sparkles only grew more numerous, "Pweeeeeeeease? With a cherry on top?"

Deidara felt himself losing power and gripped his cup tighter, though his hand was trembling, 'Must not give in—Hey, what?' His arm was already moving against his will towards Tobi, who had a malicious tone to his sparkling face. Deidara said, 'No, I can't succumb to Tobi of all people, un!"

Tobi cackled, "You know you want to sempai!"

Soon, Deidara lost the mental war as Tobi grabbed the dessert. Tobi began to devour it as Deidara cried silently into the table, 'What did I do to deserve this, un?'

…

After Tobi had polished off Deidara's parfait, he was quite the sticky mess (no, not that way yet you perverts!). Bits of cream and strawberry were everywhere on his face, in his hair, and all over his hands. Deidara wrinkled his nose at the overly sweet smell of the parfait seemed to ooze everywhere out of Tobi, "Ugh, you need to learn how to eat properly." He walked past Tobi, tugging Tobi's sleeve quickly (since Deidara wasn't particular keen on touching Tobi's sticky hands), "Come on, let's clean you up."

Tobi asked, "Aren't you sweaty from that battle, too? Wanna take a bath with me?"

Deidara stopped dead in his tracks, blood suddenly trickling down his nose. He turned around, eyes wide, "What the—Why did you ask that?"

Tobi blinked, oblivious to the reason behind Deidara's nosebleed, "Kakuzu-san said to cut down on the water bill by taking showers or baths together, and the Leader agreed."

Deidara swore, "What water bill? We're a freaking criminal syndicate, un!" He then heaved a sigh as he realized there was no point in trying to rationalize this, "Fine, fine, I'll get in with you."

Tobi smiled.

…

Steam filled the air of the closed room as Tobi hopped into the bath, splashing the water onto the floor. Deidara frowned, "Tobi, you aren't three, un! Stop flailing around!"

The tub was surprisingly large, big enough to hold three children or two adults. Tobi popped up and grabbed onto the rim of the tub, "But it's so much fun! You should lighten up once in a while, Sempai! You're like a grandpa!"

Deidara grumbled, "Better than a child." But as soon as he stepped into the hot water, he felt his anger melting away. It's been a while since he had relaxed and taken a nice soak. He let out a content sigh, "Mm, feels good."

Tobi turned around and poked Deidara, "Hey, want me to wash your back?"

"Go ahead, un," Deidara flashed a smile at Tobi, which surprised him. But Tobi slowly smiled in turn too. If his Sempai was happy, then things must be good. He grabbed a sponge and slowly rubbed up and down Deidara's back in a calm and soothing manner. It was uncharacteristic of the rambunctious Tobi, but Deidara was happy. He wondered off-handedly how someone so childish like Tobi could be such a miracle worker with his fingers.

Tobi commented, "You got a lot of tension in your shoulders, Sempai!"

Deidara retorted, "No doubt from having to deal with you, un."

Tobi blinked and poke Deidara, "What does that mean? How could you get stressed from being with someone as wonderful as me?"

"Your modesty is really shining through, isn't it?"

Tobi pouted, "You're too mean, Sempai." He fell silent for a bit, and his touch became lighter.

Deidara turned his head in confusion, "Tobi?"

". . . Am I the cause of your stress?"

Deidara blinked a little at Tobi's sudden and serious question. He considered his answer carefully, ". . . Most of it, yes."

Tobi's face didn't hold its usual smile. Instead, it held a sad, pensive look. Deidara felt his heart being pricked by needles. He turned around and quickly made an attempt to revise his words, "Um, I didn't mean it like—"

However, he was cut off by Tobi's hand which had crept to his right cheek. Tobi looked at Deidara dead in the eye and whispered, "Then, let me help take some of that stress away."

His eyes were alit with a mischievous yet seductive look. Deidara felt his mouth go dry as he shivered slightly from Tobi's touch. Tobi slid his hand down Deidara's check to his shoulders and continued down to his beloved's hand. Taking a firm grasp of it, Tobi lifted it up and clasped it with both hands. He drew it up to his face and nuzzled it, "Take me, Deidara."

Something within Deidara snapped and his primal instincts surged forward. He lunged forward and pinned Tobi to the rim of the bathtub. His lips met Tobi's. Tobi opened his mouth to grant Deidara access, and Deidara could still taste some strawberry syrup within Tobi's warm mouth. Tongue met tongue as they danced together in a clumsy yet confident manner. Slowly, Deidara pulled away. A thin trail of salvia still connected their mouths but disappeared in a second. Deidara hung over next to Tobi's ear and whispered, "Are you sure? I don't want you to think you have to do this as atonement."

Tobi moved his head so that he was right next to Deidara's ear as well. He reached up a hand and entwined his fingers into Deidara's wet hair, pulling Deidara closer. He whispered back in a lower voice, "I'm not a love martyr. I want it too."

Deidara smiled, "What a selfish kid." His hand traveled lower and brushed over Tobi's left nipple. He began to play with it with his fingers before the mouth on his hand opened up and ran its tongue over it. This elicited a shiver and soft moan from Tobi, which served to heighten Deidara's lust. Deidara nuzzled Tobi's collarbone and kissed along it.

He then felt Tobi let out a soft mewl at a certain point and became rougher with his administrations. He licked at the spot and bit it softly at first so Tobi could get used to the pain. Tobi's breath hitched at first, but became even in no time. Deidara then bit harder, enough to draw some blood. Once he tasted blood, he let up and softly lapped at the wound. Tobi let out a low moan, "A-Aaah!"

Deidara smirked. During this time, he had been playing with Tobi's chest, but he lowered his hands and slowly grasped Tobi's dick. It was only semi-hard, so Deidara immediately started stroking it to get it harder. Tobi's gasps of pleasures increased in volume, drowning out Deidara's panting. Together, Tobi's hips and Deidara's hand moved in time with each other. Soon, tongues joined in and Tobi shook with pleasure every time Deidara touched him.

Tobi lifted his arm and reached forward till he found his target: Deidara's hard manhood. Deidara jerked slightly, "T-Tobi?"

Tobi smiled playfully, "It's not fair for me to have all the fun, _Sempai_." He drawled out the last word as his hand steadily moved up and down. Deidara let out a groan of pleasure. It felt good, but he wanted more. Tobi seemed to be able to sense that, as he asked Deidara, "Deidara, please sit on the bathtub rim."

Deidara complied, lifting himself out of the water and onto the bathtub rim. Tobi wasted no time and immediately began to suck Deidara's length. His tongue swirled along the tip at first, teasing Deidara slightly. Then, he moved up and down a few times before putting the entire thing in his mouth.

Wet sounds echoed through the room along with Deidara's moans of pleasure. He placed his hand on Tobi's head and intertwined fingers with short black hair. Once the heat really started building up, Deidara pushed up and down on Tobi's head to encourage him to go faster. Tobi obliged and sucked harder, making wet and obscene noises. Deidara grunted, "I-I'm going to come—"

With a gasp, he ejaculated into Tobi's mouth, some of it spilling out. Tobi choked slightly but swallowed it anyways. It left a bitter aftertaste in his mouth but since it was Deidara's, he didn't mind.

Deidara glanced down at Tobi, whose face was covered with cum. He felt himself growing hard again, but he still had enough blood in his head to make a move to wipe Tobi's chin. Deidara scolded him slightly, "You don't have to swallow it."

Tobi smirked as he placed his hand on top of Deidara, "But I want to."

That smirk of his always drove Deidara crazy, and he captured Tobi's lips in a passionate kiss once more. He reached under to stroke Tobi's soft sphincter, rubbing it before worming a wet finger into it. Tobi let out a gasp as Deidara pushed into him. Soon, Deidara found the spot which would cause Tobi to see starts. Tobi moaned, "Oooh . . . M-more!"

Deidara leaned over and whispered, "Say it in a more respectful way, brat. After all, I am your sempai."

Tobi glared at Deidara but said, "Please, more."

Another finger slipped in and he moved in and out faster. At points, he made a scissoring motion which made Tobi squirm with delight. The steam filled the room, making it nearly impossible to breathe. Tobi said in a breathless voice, "Enough teasing, please do me already Deidara!"

Deidara murmured, "So impatient. Fine, let's get to the main event." He pulled out and positioned himself, "It's going to be a bang."

Tobi let out a small groan, "Sempai, that was terrible."

"Shut up." He pushed into Tobi and Tobi winced slightly. Deidara didn't pay much attention to it, because they had done this enough times to not worry about the small details. He kept going in until it was all the way in. He gave Tobi a few seconds to adjust to his length before moving. In and out, he built up a steady rhythm. Every time he thrust inside, he hit Tobi's prostate, causing the smaller male to scream in pleasure.

"Dei-Deidara, I'm at my limit—Aaaaaaah~!" Tobi let out a low moan as he came.

"I'm close, too—Aah!" Deidara groaned in satisfaction as he came as well. The white sperm filled up Tobi and flowed out as soon as Deidara pulled out. Their breaths were shallow and still warm from the afterglow of sex.

Tobi glanced down, seeing the water had mixed with the semen and turned a murky color, "A-aah, looks like we got dirtier than before."

Deidara said, "Kakazu is going to throw a hissy fit after seeing the water bill."

Tobi grinned, "Sempai will most definitely protect me, right?"

Deidara grunted, "We'll see." His arm snaked around Tobi as he spoke, "But for now, let's clean you up again." His fingers teased Tobi's entrance.

Tobi glanced up at Deidara and smiled, "Round 2?"

"You know it."


End file.
